Quotes

If it’s not related to elephants, it’s irrelephant.

Thanks to Adam for sharing on Facebook

Irrelevant Elephant

Animals, Elephant, Facebook, Social Networks

I was going to a fancy dress party as Harry Potters godfather.
But then someone said “You can’t be Sirius”

Thanks to Adam for sharing on Facebook

Serious Sirius

Facebook, Harry Potter, Movies, Social Networks

It was hard getting over my addiction to the hokey pokey, but I’ve turned myself around.

Thanks to Adam for sharing on Facebook

Turned myself around

Facebook, Social Networks

Just watched a documentary on how ships are held together. It was riveting.

Thanks to Adam for sharing on Facebook

Ship Rivets

Facebook, Movies, Social Networks

Laura originally only agreed to go on a date with me after I gave her a bottle of tonic water.

I schwepped her off her feet.

Thanks to Adam for sharing on Facebook

Swept her off her feet

Facebook, Social Networks

A friend of mine tried to annoy me with bird puns, but I soon realized that toucan play at that game.

Thanks to Adam for sharing on Facebook

Two Can Play That Game

Animals, Birds, Facebook, Social Networks

On my tombstone please write “Not appreciating my puns when I was alive was a grave mistake“

Thanks to Adam for sharing on Facebook

Grave Mistake

Facebook, Social Networks

Went into a pet shop and bought 10 bees. Paid my money, but counted 12 in the jar. I told the shopkeeper of his mistake.

He said,

“that’s ok, they are freebee’s.”

Thanks to Adam Barker for sharing on Facebook

Free Bee’s

Animals, Bees, Facebook, Social Networks